The Jonahs in our midst

As the clock approaches midnight this Saturday Evening, Jewish communities around the globe will gather to plead for G-d’s ear and forgiveness. The centerpiece Pizmon (refraining hymn) of the inaugural Ashkenazic Slichot Service begins with the following words:

”B’Motzaei Menucha Kidamnucha Techilla, Hat Aznecha Mimarom Yoshev Tehilla“ “Dear G-d, As Shabbat departed we consciously began our new week by coming to you, so please, please take time to listen to our prayers.”

Midnight will also usher in another seasonal period for a different, but not totally separate, set of domestic communities. September 9th will begin National Suicide Prevention Week, designed to annually surround World Suicide Prevention Day on September 10th.

The concept of our organization, Elijah’s Journey, was born at the World Suicide Prevention Day Gathering at the United Nations on September 10, 2009. A diverse array of presenters (many of them Jewish) spoke of the need to tailor effective programming and messaging to the specific nuances of one’s own community. It was heartening to hear about the innovative programs designed to promote suicide awareness and prevention in a wide range of demographics. The Jewish community may not have been the only group unmentioned on that day, but it was that omission that mattered most to us.

The national statistics on suicide are shocking. The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention estimates that there are more than 1 million domestic suicide attempts each year. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) report that there are nearly 37,000 confirmed suicides annually in America (the unreported estimate is likely closer to 50,000). To put that in context, not only do reported suicides outnumber annual motor vehicle deaths, but they also outnumber homicides by a ratio of 2:1 (with the unreported suicide estimate outnumbering homicides by a ratio of nearly 3:1)! So many of our life decisions are focused on keeping ourselves and those close to us from being victims of preventable accidents or violence. Do we devote even a fraction of that same amount of effort and thought to insure that we and those around us are emotionally safe as well?

Intentional or not, the Rabbis selected Haftarot for the High Holidiays that open our eyes to the humanity of this issue. On the first day of Rosh Hashannah we learn about Channa, whose depression stems from being childless but whose pain is exacerbated by the bullying of her husband’s other wife. On the second day, we read Jeremiah’s vision of Rachel grieving and crying over the misfortune of her descendants. At Mincha on Yom Kippur, we hear Jonah’s pleas for G-d to take his life.

The settings may have changed but many aspects of the stories remain the same. There are plenty among us who are struggling, many silently, in manners not unlike Channa, Rachel and Jonah. We know because we’ve heard their stories. Some are married or in relationships, others are single. Some are gay, some are straight. Some are CEOs, some are unemployed. Some are in college, some are in their 60s. Some pray three times a day, others have been to synagogue less than three times this year. No demographic is immune.

For the general suicide awareness/prevention community, 5772 was a very important year. It was the year that the sitting Vice President of the U.S. spoke openly about his past suicidal thoughts and millions of Bruce Springsteen fans learned of his battle with depression. It was the year that the NFL launched a suicide awareness/prevention program for its players, alumni, employees and their families, prompting former U.S. Surgeon General Dr. David Satcher to declare, “It’s time for us as a nation to deal more aggressively with issues related to mental health, and by the NFL dealing with it, it’s going to encourage a lot of other people to deal with it.”

Many wonderful and otherwise inclusive Jewish communities still appear uncomfortable talking about issues of suicide and depression. But people in virtually every synagogue are fighting these emotional battles. We may not know who they are, but they will be there and possibly even davening right next to us. As we plead for G-d to hear our prayers on Slichot Night, may our ears also be opened to the silent cries of the Channas, Rachels and Jonahs in our midst.

Efrem L. Epstein is the founder of Elijah’s Journey (www.elijahsjourney.net), an organization focusing on suicide awareness and prevention in the Jewish community.