From the other side of the bench

Speaking from the heart 

Issue of Sept. 5, 2008

I was watching at 6:47 p.m., Wednesday, Aug. 27 when history was made. I remember watching JFK’s funeral on television, man walking on the moon and a host of other historic events. I place Barack Obama’s nomination on the list of historic events I will always remember, whether I vote for him or not. Think of it. In the last four years we’ve had a woman, a Jew and now an African American come close to being elected as either Vice President or President of this great country of ours. I felt proud for a moment and confess to becoming a bit choked up.

Other countries did it long before America. But what makes these events unique is that never before has the “majority” placed into power a member of the “minority.” Don’t get me wrong. None of the historical moments were able to overshadow my general impressions of these love and hate fests once every four years. A few months back I wrote an article about the Presidential debates and how they (almost) propelled me to stick a needle in my eye. I now know why I have a second eye.

Every four years the party wishing to move into 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue spends four days telling us how miserable life in the USA is. “The American dream is being squandered. The rich are getting richer and the poor are getting poorer. Tax burdens for the lower and middle classes. Tax breaks for the rich.” Every convention, every speaker, cliché after cliché after cliché.

Then the incumbent party hosts their convention. “Life in the old US of A is great. But we can do better. We can expand the dream to all those who have not yet envisioned it. We can open the eyes of the blind, open the ears of the deaf, heal the sick.” Blah, blah, blah followed by more blah. Yet the masses buy into it. People are so desperate, feel so disconnected from personal security, that they will scream, yell, wave posters and even cry as one orator after another paints a picture of reality which most often tells only half the story.

This year’s Democratic Convention was a particularly great example of that type of lip service; of saying what needs to be said regardless of the fact that it might not be even be a distant cousin of reality. In a magnificent speech from a theatrical point of view, Bill Clinton spent 20 minutes contradicting everything he had been saying for the last two years about Barack Obama. Somehow in Bill’s world, a man who previously wasn’t fit to lead a cub scout outing was now fit to lead our country. Beautiful words with no trace of sincerity.

Then Senator Biden took the podium and proceeded to trash his friend John McCain, of whom Biden said a few weeks ago that he, Biden, would like to be McCain’s choice for Vice President. Which rhetoric of Clinton and Biden are we to believe?

Of course we know the answer. Neither. Because both of those opinions stated at two different times were connected to an “agenda.” They weren’t uttered for their inherent truth. Rather, they were spoken to further an agenda.

Democrats, don’t seethe as you read this. I am not an Anti-Democrite. I am sure Republicans will put on a similar show next week of the same double speak, the same self crafted reality. That’s the way it is in politics. When you want something badly enough, the ends justify the means. To acquire what you want, you travel the road that you think will help you get it, even though you have to wade through mud to get there. Your goal leads you to “truth” instead of the truth leading you to a goal.

This phenomenon is not restricted to the political arena. It unfortunately manifests itself in every relationship we have and in every circle in which we operate. The truth becomes a reflection of our desires instead of our desires being a manifestation of one unchallengeable truth. How often do we slant our portrayal of our friends, our children, our spouses in order to accomplish our selfish interest?

Can you imagine if for one 24 hour period, every human on this planet would abandon their self interest and speak only the truth? Can you envision how many problems would be solved, how many petty arguments would be avoided? We live in a world where the sincerity of the heart is muted by the self centered noise of our voices.   

So let me share with you a story I heard a few days ago about a couple who was having difficulty conceiving. Doctor after doctor proved unsuccessful and they contacted their clergyman. He advised them to pray and then pray some more. He promised them that if they engaged in sincere prayer, that they would be answered. A year later they returned to their clergyman more frustrated than ever. After a year of loud, vociferous prayer, making sure to pronounce all of the words slowly and carefully, she still was not pregnant.

Their clergyman sat the couple down and said, “true, your words were uttered, but G-d listens to one’s heart. Go back and this time pray with your heart.” This is a lesson that all of us, politician or not, would be well served to internalize.

I find it absolutely amazing that the average human has 32 teeth and that the Hebrew word for heart, “laiv,” spelled lamud bais, has the numerical value of 32 (lamud=30; bais=2). Could it be that we are being instructed to speak with our teeth the sincere message of our heart? I’m going to assume the answer is yes.

David Seidemann is a partner with the law firm of Seidemann & Mermelstein. He can be reached at (718) 692-1013 and at ds@lawofficesm.com.