No bubbe maisos about the Holocaust

Posted

by Michael Salamon

Issue of April 8, 2010/ 24 Nissan 5770

My father is a Holocaust survivor. In some ways I am a typical second-generation person, and in some ways I am very different. Over the years I have been involved in research that determined that survivors who are able to tell their stories to their children and others who are close to them tend to have a better outlook on life and are less likely to suffer some of the classic symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress. Perhaps it is cathartic or perhaps it is just a function of the person’s own resilient personality. Regardless, the findings have been quite consistent.

My father is one of those who told and continues to tell his story. He along with two of his brothers survived the Holocaust, but watched as Mengele separated them from their mother, a younger brother and other relatives as they arrived in Auschwitz. My father’s relatives were all immediately killed.

My father took us to his hometown in northeast Hungary and to the town that housed the ghetto. We heard of his forced labor at the BMW factory among other places and how so many people were killed. The torture that he and his fellow campmates underwent was frightening. What is more rewarding though, is the story of survival. He and his family were taken from their home immediately after Passover and liberated a year later after Passover. Passover, as well as other Yomim Tovim are a natural time for him to speak of his own exodus and he has done so for decades.

Those who survived the Shoah, and those who did not, have left us with a special insight into mankind’s cruelty and the very human desire to carry on. They have taught us much about the human condition and our relationship to one another and our G-d. Unfortunately, many have begun, perhaps inadvertently, to demean their ordeal. I am not talking about Ahmadinejad or his ilk who deny the very existence of the Holocaust. I am speaking of our very own storytellers the maggidim who embellish and in the end would pervert the story of the Holocaust to meet some other need. Several examples have been making the rounds.

A man who survived in a slave labor camp for three years once told me that while he was digging a deep trench for a German fortification a tree fell over the sides of the ditch. It was early autumn and somewhere near the time of the holiday of Sukkot. The man told me that if he had some food with him he might have made the blessing for sitting in a succah. The story has been misrepresented recently as some Jews building a succah in Auschwitz.

A tale is told that some people managed to bake matzo in Dachau. Speak with any survivor with a clear memory and you will hear, not only that no matzo baking ever happened, but also that it could not have happened. It is a complete fabrication.

I wonder why these misrepresentations are occurring. Are the stories of survival not moving enough as they are? Do we need to somehow change reality for some greater need? Have we become so habituated to the Holocaust that we have to create new stories?

The latest tale that I have been told relates to Yekusiel Yehudah Halberstam, the Klausenberg Rebbe. The Rebbe lost his entire family in the Shoah. He dedicated himself to recreating lives for young survivors. Immediately following liberation, the Rebbe arranged, with the assistance of American troops and a Jewish chaplain, for the basic trappings of a Shul and a Shabbat meal to be made available. His self-sacrifice is legendary. My father and one of his brothers were liberated with the Rebbe and spent the first months following their release with this holy man. My father told us how the Rebbe did not eat his first meal after liberation before first spending time in prayer. When he finally did eat, the Rebbe washed his hands in the traditional way before sitting down to eat. He slowly and deliberately ate his meal and offered the blessings following the food.

A new tale has begun to circulate about him that is very likely untrue. This new story that is making the rounds is that the Rebbe arranged for a chulent to be served at that first meal. One of the survivors, so angry at G-d for what had transpired to him and the death of his family members, threw a dead cat into the chulent that the Rebbe had prepared. How this could possibly have transpired, where the cat came from or why it was dead is never explained. This lack of accuracy leads to a total lack of credibility for all of the Rebbe’s greatness. We do not need to embellish, we simply need to tell the true events. The Klausenberg Rebbe was there, when no one else was. He brought a sense of warmth and spirituality back to those who had lost everything.

Several recent outright false stories about the Holocaust have appeared in recent years. The endearing story entitled “Angel at the Fence” by Herman Rosenblat, was found to be a fabrication after Oprah did a story on Mr. Rosenblat. By embellishing survivor’s stories we diminish the inspiration, strength and hope that survivors of the Shoah give us.

Exaggerating or embellishing stories may be seen by some as an acceptable way to teach morals or make a point to our children but not at the price of distorting the lives and history of real individuals. Our children need reality to be inspired. Changing true stories does not inspire, it diminishes. It is counterproductive to take a true story and turn it into an old wives tale when the reality is so much more powerful.

Dr. Salamon, a Fellow of the American Psychological Association, is the founder and director of ADC Psychological Services, PLLC, in Hewlett, NY. He is the author of numerous articles and several psychological tests. His most recent book is The Shidduch Crisis: Causes and Cures.